Yoruichi the PI
by ShiroIV
Summary: So basically Soul applied for a job in death city and finds himself working for Yoruichi shihouin, a slightly eccentric PI with a taste for mystery.
1. Chapter 1

Soul milled about the high street of Death City, Maka had told him he had three weeks to make significant advances in finding a job or she'd throw him out. Soul doubted she'd actually throw him out but he was a drain on her rescores and Soul didn't like being a parasite, especially from a good friend.

A week ago he'd filled out an application Maka had brought from a Private Detectives place and told Soul he should apply as, she assumed, since he was a master at the 'Professor Layton' games he'd be a good detective...naturally. Three days after filling out the application he got a call from a silky voiced female claiming to be the private detective he would become the subordinate of. The 'Telephone interview' seemed to go quite well and she told him he got the job and was starting on Monday. And now he stood in the town, wondering what to do as he arrived at 'Yoruichi the PI' he went to a café across the street from the shop. With a $10 bill he'd borrowed from Maka he ordered coffee. Yoruichi's shop hadn't actually been opened yet so Soul was hoping to get a look to see what she actually looked like before she went in.

The sun slowly crept over the buildings of Death City. Why did he have to wake up so early? After about half an hour a woman approached the shop. Well, waddled would be a better word. Morbidly obese; the woman stopped in front of the shop and stared at the door. Was this Yoruichi? Soul though feeling slightly deflated. The woman turned and waddled away. "You seem awfully interested in that shop" Someone said.

"Huh?" Soul mumbled looking up at the talker. Soul recognised the voice. A dark skinned beauty stood looking down at him. Her golden catlike eyes inspected him with a tinge of mischief. "What's it to you?" Soul said feeling slightly defensive.

"Considering it's my shop, quite a lot" She said. In her hands were a bagel and a coffee in a polystyrene cup. "I'll assume you're Soul"

"Uh" Soul managed before mentally punching himself, of course the woman's voice was familiar.

"Whatever" She said walking away "come whenever you're ready"

Soul quickly got up and followed her. Soul wasn't much of a judge on women…. anyone bigger than an A-cup would suit him but this woman was on a different level. The way she moved, lips, eyes, skin, hair and legs all perfect. She had a face built for smiling. "So what's the deal with you" She said over her shoulder as they crossed the road. "White hair and red eyes, you're not even albino"

"Genetics" Soul said "Red eyes and white hair runs in my family"

"Huh" Yoruichi said "This hair, comes from my family, too, it's funny how that works don't you think?" It took Soul a second to realise she was teasing him

"You're quite the comedian"

"You'll be taking my money, I'll at least expect you to listen to my jokes" She said. She pulled out a set of keys and unlocked the door. "By the way does my perfume smell nice?" She said "I bought it yesterday and I can't tell"

"I can't smell it" Soul said… big mistake… or a stroke of luck. She grabbed his head and plunged his face into her bosoms.

"How about now?" She asked. Of course Soul never heard her; he'd already fainted.

Yoruichi let him fall to the ground and stood looking down at his body, his nose let out a steady flow of blood. "This is gonna be so much fun!" She said. She bent down and picked up Soul and put him on the sofa she usually had people wait on if she was too busy to get what they needed.

Just then, her phone rang. "Oh my" She said "who phones right on opening time" She sat down on her chair and picked up the phone "Yoruichi the PI" she said out of habit.

"Hi this is Chief Inspector Medusa of the-"

"Yeah I know who you are" Yoruichi replied now fully uninterested "What do you want?" she leant back on her chair and decided to pick her nose.

"It's came to my attention for the Anderson case you may have invaded the defendants privacy"

"Prove it"

"You know we can't" Came the devious snake's voice "but watch your back, I've got a big knife I just can't wait to stick in it"

"Kinky" Yoruichi smiled

"Yh…I will…I'm getting to that" She seemed to argue with someone with more power than her. "Anyway, Yoruichi, I'd like to…with great…esteem invite you on coalition case with the DCPD"

Yoruichi considered telling her to stick the job where the sun didn't shine but if it was so stumping that it made Medusa swallow her pride it may be fun "Where do you want me?" Yoruichi flicked her booger at Soul but unfortunately missed.

"12 Myth St." Medusa said "you'll be…awarded when the case is solved"

"Haven't you ever picked up a prostitute?" Yoruichi said "half now and half on finish"

"Are you saying you're a prostitute?" Yoruichi heard the smile in Medusa's voice

"Hmm" Yoruichi mumbled "if you're good at it, get paid for it I say"

"And that means soliciting your body for sex"

"You said it, not me" Yoruichi was purposely dodging, trying to back Medusa into a corner where she'd reveal juicy details about her past. Yoruichi liked secrets, a person was defined by what they decided to keep a secret and what they choose to reveal. With a little tinkering she usually got people to accidentally reveal their dirtiest secrets but Medusa was a smart woman, she rarely fell for Yoruichi's vocal skill. "What was the name of you first boyfriend?"

"None of your business" She replied

"Girlfriend?"

"Goodbye" She hung up.

"Tsch" Yoruichi tutted

"Urgh" Soul muttered sitting up

"Was my perfume too…strong?" She asked "too much iron?"

"You're a pervert" Soul said

"Huh?" She smiled "how did you come to that conclusion?"

"Why?"

"Last I recall, it was you motor boating my DD's and fainting"

"You shoved my head into them"

"Lies, you're lucky I'm a cool woman but I'll be having less of your deviant actions, you beast"

"Oh shut up" Soul said

"Never mind all that" She said "We've got a case"

"What's happening?"

"Don't know" She said "the DCPD want us to look at a murder or something"

"Where is it?"

"12 Myth Street"

"Isn't that the bank?"

"Is it?" She said

"Well Myth Street is the main retail area and the bank has a big twelve on it so I assume the bank was number twelve"

"The next Sherlock Holmes, I see" Yoruichi said standing up. "Let's not waste anymore time"

"Okay then" Soul followed Yoruichi out of the building just as someone was stepping in

"Oh glad you could make it Soi Fon" Yoruichi said "hold down the fort, we've got some investigating to do"

"Sure thing" the petite girl said she barely even looked at Soul as she walked past. "Did you hear what happened to the bank?"

"No" Yoruichi said "but the PD want us there"

"Apparently it was robbed and the vault was never opened, no signs of a tunnel or anything into it either"

"Yes!" Yoruichi said "I love mysteries like this"

"Don't get too carried away, the Anderson case nearly put us out of business"

"C'mon Soul" Yoruichi said "Gloomy-guts, here doesn't know what fun is"

"Why is there blood on the floor?" Soul heard Soi Fon say as the door closed behind them.

"That was Soi Fon" Yoruichi said "She's the secretary, she usually gets the cases and hands them out to us"

"Is there another?" Soul wondered

"Sometimes a guy called Kisuke free-lances with us when he's short on cash, but that's not very often"

"Okay" Soul said

"To be perfectly honest, I don't like it when Kisuke helps…he's too good" She said "Always solves the cases before me"

"Do you have a car?" Soul asked

"Yes, the purple one there" She pointed at an Aston Martin that sat between two SUV's. It suited Yoruichi well, for some reason.

I didn't take long to reach the bank, especially in the car. News teams and police milled about outside. Yoruichi quickly found a parking spot and turned off the engine. "Now remember, try not to contaminate anything and no matter how menial it may seem if it's out of the ordinary then it's evidence" She opened the door and stepped out. Sighing, Soul followed.

"This is a regular case for you then?"

"Semi-regular" She replied "my people skills are sought out by many, with my fighting skill too I double up as a bodyguard and thief but don't tell anyone that"

Soul instantly recognised Chief Inspector Medusa of the DCPD, she liked to appear in local news and talk about drugs and crime. She wasn't much of a pencil pusher like the rest of the people her rank. "Here we go" Yoruichi muttered "Hi there Medusa"

"Yoruichi" She replied "it's been so long I forgot how truly stunning you are"

"Buy me dinner first" Yoruichi said "Nice necklace, is that a real diamond?"

"No" She said "It's glass" She tucked the golden chain into her top. Soul didn't particularly know about jewellery but if it was a real diamond it'd be worth a fortune.

"Is that right" Yoruichi said

"Getting to the point" Medusa replied "this criminal is a clever cookie, whoever she or he is"

"People usually say he or she not the other way around" Yoruichi said "some deep seated sexism there?"

"Just do your damn investigating and get out of my face" Medusa said "who are you exactally?" It took Soul a second to realise she was talking to him.

"The noob who's started out at my joint" Yoruichi said

"What happened to the little tart with the scowls?" She asked

"She's holding down the fort" Yoruichi said "ever since she was shot in the leg she's been unwilling to risk it all these days and prefers the calmer times now"

"Yeah, okay" Medusa sighed "damn it, I didn't ask for her life's story"

"Weather's been nice these days, huh?" Yoruichi said

"Just go in the damn bank and look for clues" Medusa muttered before shouting and cussing at a cameraman who snuck past the cordoned area.

"Do you know who done it yet?" Yoruichi said to soul

"No" Soul replied. Yoruichi couldn't have possibly figured it out yet

"I've got a feeling but I can't prove it" She said "c'mon I need to talk to Soi Fon, BRB"

"Who says BRB" Soul muttered watching… admiring Yoruichi as she walked away. The police guard stepped aside for Soul. He couldn't help but admit this job was quite surreal. Last detective story he'd seen was that god awful Sherlock series with a woman as Watson.

Inside the bank police and forensics milled around looking for clues that Yoruichi believed the un-qualified Soul would discover before them. Soul pondered on what to do…maybe she should take a look at the vault? A security guard walked up to Soul. "Where are your parents, kid are you lost?"

"Dude, I'm eighteen years old" Soul said. He crinkled his nose, the Security guard smelt weird "are you wearing perfume?"

"No" The security guard said defensively smelling himself. Red-faced the security guard walked away again.

"So I got Soi Fon to check if anyone had entered the bank that night" Yoruichi said appearing beside him

"And?"

"The security guard hadn't checked anyone in" She replied "besides the cleaners"

"Are they suspects?" Soul asked

"Found a print!" a young forensic girl exclaimed

"Why is that a big thing?" Soul asked

"It's likely they found it somewhere nobody should be touching" Yoruichi said "it's unlikely it's the criminal's, this person is so talented they can sneak into a locked vault without alerting anyone and escape in a similar fashion"

"Yeah, they'd never take their gloves off"

The young forensic girl handed the clear piece of plastic that held the fingerprint to Medusa. "Thank you Eruka" She smiled "Get this searched for immediately, start local and then nationwide if necessary"

"Roger" Said a police officer who scanned it with a scanner attached to a Laptop that they brought in.

"I wonder who we get" Yoruichi muttered looking over Soul's shoulder. The search didn't take long before it found a match. The screen flashed up with a face…Yoruichi's face. Every pair of eyes changed from the computer to Yoruichi. Yoruichi narrowed her eyes. "Well that was unforeseen"

"What were you doing between 9:00pm and 11:00pm last night?" Medusa said with devious smile on her face…


	2. Chapter 2

Soul stood and watched Yoruichi be handcuffed and led out of the building. Before she'd been cuffed she pushed a piece of paper into his hand. He looked at it briefly; it was someone's phone number. "I'll be fine" Yoruichi said to him and smiled. She gave him a thumbs up exposing a scar across her thumb. Soul got Yoruichi's message, the print was pure and clean and it was the same hand, the same thumb as the one Yoruichi had the scar on…Yoruichi was innocent.

Damn it! Soul thought, how was he supposed to bail out Yoruichi. Maybe Soi Fon would know! Soul quickly removed himself from the bank before anyone noticed that he probably wasn't supposed to be there now that his boss was the primary suspect.

As Soul didn't know how to drive he walked. It also gave him time to consider. He'd only met this woman today, what if she really was a cat burglar and Soi Fon was an accomplice? Maybe this number was a governor she'd seduced and would get her out of jail for a price…a creamy one.

Soul shook his head. Despite Yoruichi's flirtatious attitude Soul got the feeling she had high standards for men, Soul wouldn't blame her if she did. With looks like that she could afford to be fussy. Back to the evidence! Yourichi had the scar on her thumb but no alibi for the night unless 'watching the new Iron Man alone' counted and Soul doubted it would stand in court.

Coming to the shop he opened the door. "So I got the details for…" Soi Fon narrowed her eyes when she realised Yoruichi wasn't with him. "Err"

"Arrested"

"Again?" Soi Fon facepalmed "What for now?"

"They think she was the one who robbed the bank"

"Did she?"

"I don't think so" Soul said "she has a scar on her thumb, and the fingerprint was of the same thumb and it didn't have a scar"

"Her fingerprints are on document ever since…" She sighed "never mind, what's that"

"It's a phone number" He said handing it to her. She scrutinised it.

"016…" There was a loud thud as Soi Fon slammed her head on the desk "not him…not again"

"Who is it?"

"Urahara" She scowled "you phone, I'm going home"

Soul watched Soi Fon walk away. All that angst, she needed someone to loosen her up. Soul would have to admit, she was closer to his age and he'd make a valiant attempt…probably to steely denial but if you don't ask you don't get…ken? Soul made a mental note to try and ask Soi Fon on a date as he picked up the phone. He dialled the number.

"Yoruichi, long-time" Said a flamboyant male voice

"Uh" Soul murmured "there is a slight problem with Yoruichi"

"Oh dear" he said "was Soi Fon worried?"

"Not really"

"Not my problem" He said and Soul was greeted with an empty dial tone.

"Christ sake" Soul muttered looking around the office for something interesting "c'mon something, anything?" Soul found a piece of paper with an address on it. "Hmm" Soul muttered. The address was a block of flats not far from Maka and Soul's place.

It took Soul fifteen minutes to reach the block, Apartment 15D the piece of paper said. Soul sighed and put his hands in his pockets. "Bank robbery, boss arrested and it's not even lunch time". He strolled into the block and travelled up all fifteen floors and now stood in front of apartment 15D. "Let's see where this gets us" He muttered. He knocked on the door. After a few seconds of silence there was a click and the door opened. Soul chuckled awkwardly when Soi Fon poked her head from behind the door. "How did you get my address" She said

"Err, I found it" Soul said

"Snooping in Yoruichi's stuff?" Soi Fon said, her scowl lifted and she turned her back and opened the door fully. "Find anything useful?"

"I hope so" Soul said taking Soi Fon's actions as an invite and followed her inside.

Soul looked around Soi Fon's apartment, her curtains were closed and the TV showed an online lobby for a popular FPS. Some magazines littered a coffee table in the middle of the living room which, red-faced, Soul realised they were porn. "Do you drink tea?" Soi Fon asked from the kitchen.

"Yes" Soul said "two sugars and milk"

"Exotic" Soi Fon said sarcastically. Soul looked at Soi Fon's Laptop, she had left it on EBay, and she was looking at fertiliser for some reason. "Stop snooping" Came Soi Fon's voice from the kitchen

"I wasn't" Soul said

"Did you phone…Urahara?" She asked

"Yeah but he hung up on me" Soul said

"After this cuppa" Soi Fon said with a hint of a British accent falling through her American "we'll have to get to the DCPD"

"Why?"

"Yoruichi used her one call a day to tell me to get to the DCPD by four"

"I'm coming too?"

"Unless you want to stay and watch reruns of 'Murder she wrote'" So Fon Paused "do you hear that?"

Soul listened. He heard ticking; he looked around for a clock on the wall…there was none. "Have you got a loud clock?" Soul said

"No" Soi Fon plundered around moving things, opening cupboards and froze when she opened the cabinet that her TV stood on. "Oh, Shit!" Soi Fon said "Run!"

Soi Fon's normally calm voice shattered the quite of the entire block. Soul didn't need to be told twice he turned and, with all his energy, sprinted toward the door. He paused to open it and threw himself out. Just then the loudest noise Soul had ever heard erupted from behind him. The shockwave from the explosion hurled him into the wall of the corridor outside. Heat and debris stung his skin.

As quickly as it had come the noise and force had subsided. Soul couldn't hear anything besides a loud droning buzz, he tried to open his eyes, everything was blurry and spinning. "I've decided" Soi Fon shouted from beside him "I don't like you"

"Great" Soul muttered "I'll pick you… Up at…four" Everything went black.

Yoruichi idly strolled around the holding cell she had been sitting in for twenty minutes. As a funny turn of events she had been placed in the same cell as her rival PI Shura Kirigakure who'd been arrested for breaking and entering. Shura was one of Yoruichi's best friends and despite being her business rival they got along swimmingly. "So" Shura grinned "you've been naughty"

"No" Yoruichi said "It was a set-up this time"

"Yeah" Shura laughed "_this_ time, remember Bangkok?"

"Or Cairo" Yoruichi chuckled "Enough of this" She said, she had to keep her composure and stop remembering about the glory days with her, Shura and a sixteen year old Soi Fon "I need to think about who's doing this"

Shura scoffed "You know who's doing it, hell; I know who's doing it"

"True" Yoruichi said "I just need to trap them"

"Easier said than done" Shura said "need any help?"

"No" Yoruichi said "I know what you're favours are like"

"I hear you've got yourself a young apprentice, young males are just so fun, aren't they?"

"So you're still cutting around with that Rin boy, huh?"

"Hell yeah" She said. She paused and narrowed her eyes "What's that?" Yoruichi turned just in time to see the door that led out of the holding cells slightly ajar with a shadowy hand holding a pistol. "How 1970's crime drama" Shura said sarcastically. There was a quiet whoosh like a gust of wind. Shura cried out and clutched her arm.

Without wasting another second Yoruichi, grabbed a bed and flipped it over and hid behind it. "You shot the wrong guy, you bastard!" Shura shouted. There were five more shots which struck the bed Yoruichi hid behind sending little geysers of fluff from inside the mattress. "Not gonna lie" Shura muttered, now holding her leg "Your aim sucks!" She shouted "I'm slightly stressed right now"

"Are they gone?" Yoruichi asked

"I dunno" She replied.

Yoruichi considered her options; it'd be a bit selfish to ask Shura to look so she slowly peeked above the cover of the bed. Another quiet pop and pain seared through Yoruichi's already sore head. The pain was the first sign that despite the bullet hitting her head she was still alive. "Like I said" Shura said dryly "bad aim, how could they only graze that big, stupid head of yours?"

"Shot, arrested and stuck with you" Yoruichi said "and it's not even lunch time"

"Funny" Shura laughed "I feel _exactly _the same"

There was a clamour from the corridor outside. Yoruichi decided not to cover her wound…just to play the innocent victim, maybe they'd let her go and she could hurry up and try to solve it. A few detectives burst through the door with pistols drawn. "What's happened here?" Medusa demanded

"We got shot" Shura poked her head up. "Yoruichi got hit in the head"

"What!" Demanded a male voice

"I'm alright" Yoruichi said. She could've sworn she heard someone tut. There was another pop as a cloaked figure burst from behind the door and fired a shot into Medusa's stomach. With a groan she fell to the ground. The attacker took aim at Yoruichi. A white gloved hand grabbed the cloaked figure's arm and pushed it upward with enough force to break the man's arm with a sickening crunch.

Lord Death looked down at the unconscious assassin that he'd just karate chopped on the head. Yoruichi was starting to think he actually killed him. Lord Death was the absolute commander of the DCPD and was single handily responsible for taking down the Shiba family mafia. Yoruichi didn't particularly like Death for that achievement; the next don of the family became Kukaku who was another of Yoruichi's best friends. Though a shadow of his former self Lord Death was still a force to be reckoned with, Yoruichi still wondered with his real face looked like beneath that mask.

"It seems the evidence against you has crumbled slightly" Lord Death said in his stupid goofy voice. He produced a piece of paper from his cloak and showed it to Yoruichi. Her right thumb print was circled in red ink. The print had an imperfection across it caused by the scar she'd obtained whilst training Soi Fon in kendo.

"Who's the chump" Shura limped up to them

"An esteemed 'Konoha Ninja'" Lord Death said

"When he wakes up" Yoruichi said wrapping a bandage around her head "tell him he's got crappy aim"  
"Yeah" Medusa said. She sat on the floor with her hand on her stomach "I'm just going to sit here and bleed"

"We called the hospital" Death said "you'll want to get to the hospital too, there has been an explosion and two of your employees are hurt"

"Not badly?" Yoruichi said with a little bit of panic entering her voice

"Oh no" He said "but I hope Soi Fon was insured"

Yoruichi had to take her chances. Yoruichi didn't trust the DCPD as far as she could throw them; they were all a bunch of sharks. Death probably still suspected Yoruichi but released her in hope she'd lead him to more evidence to support a court case. In terms of the case she was back to square one. She'd suspected Medusa of the framing and the robbery but the assassin shot her when she was in the way, which meant that _if _Medusa robbed the bank she wasn't the one trying to kill her and obviously Soul and Soi Fon too. Maybe an accomplice double-crossed her?

Needless to say she'd have to go and see if Soi Fon was still in one piece. Perhaps Soul had contacted Urahara by now; Urahara would begin work from the shadows and use his computing genius to try to corner whoever was doing this.

It had taken a while to walk to the hospital, a column of smoke showed the degree of damage caused by the bomb or whatever it was. As Lord Death was wrestling with the young Konoha Ninja Yoruichi had managed to pickpocket the young male. He had a key to a PO box in the post office in Myth street and a piece of paper with the words

'Konohamaru, the target is Yoruichi Shihouin; consider her armed and extremely dangerous

-Tsunade'

Yoruichi knew who Tsunade was, they'd met once back when she worked for the Go… never mind. As Yoruichi walked toward the hospital she considered the possibilities like a massive web of invisible blue lasers above her head. To no avail however, there were pieces missing, she needed more evidence and hopefully this wouldn't be her last case, ever!


	3. Chapter 3

Dr Stein of the DCPD forensics department sighed again. A flamboyant scientist had managed to pull some random political strings and get into his laboratory for an 'inspection'. The medium height weedy blonde inspected Steins top of the range 3D printer which irked Stein, it was as if he knew someone had stolen a large portion of high quality polymer from it, that stuff costs an arm and a leg and if Lord Death found out someone had been helping themselves to his supplies…

"What did you say your na-"

"Kurotsuchi, do you want me to spell it for you?" The man suggested. The ridiculous white and green hat he wore gave his eyes a rather sinister shade to them. "I won't be much longer, you can continue with your…practices soon"

"What type of inspection is this supposed to be, I thought the FBI liked to send serious people" Stein said

"I am serious, your lesser intellect just can't comprehend the complexities of higher thought" Kurotsuchi said strolling toward the door.

"Are you trying to bait some kind of reaction from me?"

"Heavens, no" Kurotsuchi chuckled but his eyes remained shaded and cold "Who is your assistant again, Eruka, was her name?"

"Yes, she specialises in fingerprints and human…leavings"

"How convenient" Kurotsuchi muttered

"Are we under investigation for some kind of crime?" Stein asked, this man's questions were all over the place, what kind of picture was he trying to build? "Can I see your badge and warrant again?"

"Of course" Kurotsuchi handed them over. Stein took the paper and the card and investigated them. They were odd, he'd never really held an FBI badge before but this one didn't seem right.

"Do you mind if I…" Stein paused and sighed when he saw the door lying open and 'Kurotsuchi' gone. Stein felt his cheeks redden slightly; he'd been punked by this…imbecile. This day was only gonna get better…

Urahara smiled as he strolled away from the DCPD, he dropped his 'Visitors Pass' into a trash can as he passed. "Yoruichi was right" He said into a tape recorder "It seems…judging by the log book by the printer, that a portion of the…ink is gone"

Urahara looked over his shoulder, he may have left the army years ago but the instincts never left him. The assassin that tried to kill Yoruichi had escaped and was now tailing Urahara. That must mean the enemy knew Urahara was a known affiliate of Yoruichi's, not good, maybe he'd have to stage his death again. Who was the enemy anyway? Those Konoha Ninja's aren't reckless, especially after the whole mess with Balalaika and the Russian Mafia; they'd never take a job that put them in the firing line of three former members of the Gotei 13. Not to mention Lord Death, Medusa and finally popping two slugs into a woman as volatile as Shura Kirigakure was a dangerous road to be wandering down. Konoha are throwing caution to the wind and Urahara didn't know why, it's likely they've already dispatched one of their esteemed Jōnin ninja's. Not good. He'd have to report his findings to Yoruichi and leave town before all hell breaks loose.

Finding Yoruichi wasn't hard. When he'd got to the hospital he'd found her in the reception feeding coins into a vending machine. She wasn't depressed looking so Urahara assumed Soi Fon had managed to keep her life this time. "Long time no see" He said approaching her. She looked up from the machine; she had a bandage wrapped around her head in a similar fashion to Kukaku Shiba.

"Kisuke" She said looking back to the machine, she prodded a button and with a rumble the machine spat out a bottle of juice. "Did you discover anything?"

"Yes" He said "It is exactly as you predicted but I don't think Stein is involved"

"If that's the case I don't understand where she'd be hiding the money, Stein has the know-how to hide a massive amount of money"

"No doubt Medusa has the know-how too but she'd have to be cautious, even Death is watching her"

Yoruichi sighed "This one is puzzling" She considered something "I'm going back to check on Soi Fon, she saw the bomb and maybe the quality of it can cast some light on the creator"

"Very well" Urahara said "call me if you need anything, I've got more espionage to do for those Black Lagoon sociopaths"

"Unlucky" Yoruichi said "I will"

Yoruichi turned and headed to Soi Fon's room. Yoruichi had to cover the expenses of the injuries since 'Free healthcare' was one of Soi Fons employee of the month perks and thus, she had quite a luxury room. Soul had barely been injured, only mildly concussed, Soi Fon had inadvertently shielded him from most of the blast and she wasn't letting him forget it.

Soi Fon had been dressed in one of the hospital gowns and had pulled the blankets of her bed up of no one could see her in the ridiculous outfit. "What was the bomb like?" Yoruichi said. Soi Fon looked at the ceiling.

"An old fashion alarm clock attached to two pipe bombs which were both attached to three two litre bottles of Petrol each"

"Six litres of Petrol?" Yoruichi said "no wonder the apartment block was burning like that"

"I know" Soul said from the chair in the corner, he sat with his arms crossed and an annoyed look on his face "have you seen gas prices these days?"

"Shut up, you" Soi Fon scowled "anyway the wiring was done superbly, either he was a good electrician or an ex-soldier or mercenary or Assassin or some or crap like that"

"Strange" Yoruichi said "I'd ran into an assassin today, here I got a PO Box key from him"

"If he's still alive I've got a little favour to return"

"He's Konoha" Yoruichi said "only a Genin"

Soul would have to admit; he had no idea what they were talking about "Who the hell are Konoha?"

"It's a 'Ninja village'" Yoruichi said

"They are Mercenaries; they do missions for any paying customer"

"Are you able to work?"

"Nah" Soi Fon said "the blast took off my left leg, luckily I was operated on by the surgeon Orihime Inoue who works wonders and she reattached it but I'll need some physiotherapy to get the leg back to the way it was, I'm afraid I've been benched for a few weeks"

"Alright" Yoruichi said "Soul, are you at least able to do something"

"Sure why not" Soul said standing up "you better pay me the overtime though"

"Don't push it" Yoruichi said "it's only lunch time"

Soul had followed Yoruichi to her car and after spending ten minutes looking underneath it and in the hood. She got in and started it up. "We're going to the post office" She said "I'm curious what this Ninja had stored away"

"Any guesses?" Soul asked

"It's unlikely it'll say who sent the guy but it'll have some kind of clue who supplied the equipment needed for this job" Yoruichi said. She started the car and pulled away "I think to solve this case we're gonna have to figure out how Medusa or whoever the criminal is robbed the bank"

"Maybe she seduced the guard" Soul said remembering the guard smelling of perfume

"Perhaps" Yoruichi said "in this town…nothing is quite that simple"

"The guard did smell of perfume" Soul added

"We'll have to chat to him" Yoruichi said "I saw him at the Police station when I was there"

"First the bank?"

"No" She said "First the Post Office, then the bank"

"We were just at the bank though"

"I know that" She said

"Great"

"Do it in this order, it might explain how the bank was robbed, if this Genin helped rob the bank, he'll have some evidence there" Yoruichi turned on the radio and turned it up as a warning that the conversation was over. Soul sighed for two reasons. One of these reasons was that Yoruichi was becoming a harder and harder person to understand and the second was Linkin Park sucked and Yoruichi's singing was almost as bad and since both filled the void of silence in the car it put Soul in a bad mood.

After the drive was through they pulled over at the post office. "I hate Linkin Park" Soul said crossing his arms. Yoruichi responded with a delighted laugh.

"Good" She opened the car door and got out. The post office was an old building, it was one of the original buildings of the town before Lord Death crushed the organised crime of the city and turned it into a paradise for the working class family. Yoruichi held the red post office door open for Soul.

Inside, they found the P.O box easily and opened it. "Huh?" Yoruichi said pulling out a picture of a young woman…a busty young woman who wore a bandage over her head like Yoruichi currently had. "Kukaku Shiba" Yoruichi handed the picture to Soul. "It says she's the client, which means she just sent an assassin after me"

"Why would she do that, I thought you said you were friends"

"I don't know" Yoruichi said visibly shaken by her findings "go home, Soul, that's enough for today"

"Uh" Soul stammered "Okay"

She returned the picture to the P.O Box and locked it again. Soul turned and walked away, something was bugging him and he knew this Urahara person, if he was as good with computers as Yoruichi said he was, Soul would need his assistance…


	4. Chapter 4

Urahara hacked into the DCPD's servers in record time, all this espionage was reminding him of the old days. Soul had managed to phone him before he'd actually left Death City and after he'd shook the assassin following him. He headed over to Soul's apartment; Soul shared it with a goody-two-shoes girl called Maka who seemed to regard Urahara with similar contempt reserved for vicious dogs and sharks.

"You can access the CCTV of the police department, yes?" Soul asked

"No…" Urahara said "they have it on a closed circuit connection; we can't access it unless we're physically in the building"

"I guess you're not the hacker Yoruichi made you…"

"Luckily I put a ghost programme in the system that I can control remotely and that can access the CCTV and send it to us" Urahara cut in. Soul smiled slyly.

"Can I see the Assassin Yoruichi was talking about?"

"That happened at 10:00 roughly" Urahara said.

Soul didn't really know much about hacking but the movies seemed to get it pretty wrong, Urahara barely typed anything on the keyboarded all it really was, was a lot of clicking and using keygens to generate passwords and user id's.

After five minutes of fast forwarding and switching between camera angles. He came to the moment the assassin and Lord Death clashed. Lord Death was a scary guy; he seemed to injure the Assassin with one tug. He saw Yoruichi go down to help Lord Death drag the Assassin into a cell, this is where she took the items off of him, it was a crafty move, Soul never would have noticed if he wasn't specifically looking for the transaction. "What were you expecting to find?" Urahara said "I hope I haven't been wasting my time"

"Nothing, it just seems someone is going through extreme measures to try to derail Yoruichi's investigation" Soul said "and now that Yoruichi has seen her friend is the assassin's hirer she seems to be about to do something silly"

"Which friend is this?" Urahara asked rewinding the footage and playing it again

"Kukaku Shiba"

"Oh my" He said

"She's a mob boss…" Soul stopped and stared at the screen…did he just see what he thought he saw? "Stop, can you play it back a few seconds"

"See something?" Urahara said

"Whoa!" Soul exclaimed, Urahara played it back in slow motion, he saw the transaction in its brilliant deviance

"Oh my" Urahara said again.

"Crap" Soul said "It all makes sense, the pieces have are matching and fit perfectly"

"It still doesn't explain Medusa"

Just then Soul's best friend Black Star burst in. "What is this!" He exclaimed "You're out fighting assassins and I'm working in an office, trade jobs with me now!"

"I never actually fought the assassin" Soul said

"Yeah whatever, I've got to go to Lord Death's hypnosis class again"

"There is a Hypnosis class?" Soul said "why?"

"How should I know?"

"That doesn't matter I've got an attractive woman to save"

He picked up his hoodie and left quickly. It already had got dark outside and the desert air was chilly and sinister. Soul started at a jog down the street toward the shop hoping that Yoruichi was in and not already throwing her life or freedom away. Soul remembered something Yoruichi had said about the families and former gangsters. Apparently the Shihouin clan was a mob family as well but they fizzed away to nothing before Lord Death made one hell of a first impression. So her family was known for being criminals, that wouldn't help one bit.

Soul chuckled, he'd known her a single day and now he was genuinely trying to help her and not for teenage boy reasons either. Soul was about to start singing Avenged Sevenfold to help himself think when he noticed the headlights from a car behind him. The light made his shadow extend a few metres in front of himself. With a worrying thought Soul noticed his shadow was in the centre of the light, meaning the car was exactly behind him. He turned into the glare of the headlights. The driver accelerated when Soul turned.

Embarrassingly all intelligent thought left his body and he stood rooted to the spot as the car sped up. The closer it got the more Soul willed himself to move; this wasn't what cool guys did. Before the speeding car could mow him down he was struck by someone to his left. The force of the impact pushed him out of the way of the car. It never stopped or even slowed. It continued until it reached a corner and disappeared around it.

His saviour stood up before he could full comprehend who it was. "Shihouin is not at her office" The young male said "you haven't fully figured it out yet"

"Wait" Soul said "you're the assassin, why are you helping?"

"Shut up, that's why" The youngster said with a considerably higher voice "I mean…" his voice became deeper and more serious and for some reason he started elongating words like someone imitating a ghost would. "Yooouuu need to follow the clues and go to 122 Ara…Arashi Street" He scrunched up a piece of paper and disappeared in a puff of smoke from a smoke bomb.

"Did that really just happen?" Soul asked himself. He tutted and stood up.

What was he missing? He went over the evidence: no signs of a break in, the money disappearing, the guard smelling of perfume, the assassin, Kukaku Shiba, Medusa…freaking…Lord Death's Hypnotising lessons…click! The picture he'd built was replaced with another, a brilliant, devious plot that'd change everything!

He broke out in a run again this time he headed toward Arashi Street. As far as he was aware Arashi Street was a upper-class area with mansions and manor houses. Pulling out his phone he quickly sifted through his contacts. He'd registered Lord Death a few weeks ago when Maka and her creepy father Detective Spirit had invited Lord Death around for dinner one day. He hit dial and slowed to a walk.

"Hello?" came Death's goofy voice after the second ring.

"Hi" he said "it's Soul Evans, I work for Yoruichi"

"Of course, how can I be of assistance?"

"uh" Soul said wondering how to phrase the following "I've figured out the identity of the criminal behind the Bank robbery"

"Oh really, who might that be?" He asked

"I can't explain" he said "can you come to Kukaku Shiba's house at Arashi Street, also bring Medusa"

"I hope you're not wasting time"

"I'm not" Soul said "hurry, there isn't much time"

Yoruichi's heart beat steadily as Kukaku; completely unsuspecting that she knew the truth sat drinking tea in front of her. "This is a nice surprise" Kukaku said "what brings you around to my place at such a time a night, if we start a conversation we'd be up 'till the wee hours debating"

"I suppose" Yoruichi said with a false smile "my foresight has dwindled recently"

"Happens to the best of us" Shiba said smiling. How could she sit and smile when she hired someone to kill one of her best friends. "I may not look it but I feel old"

"Huh?" Yoruichi said. The serious turn of this conversation was unexpected.

"You heard" She replied "my family, I feel the years of crimes they all committed all upon my shoulders I think it's time to hang up the old Shiba clan legacy and quit whilst I have one arm left"

Yoruichi looked at the bandage which covered the transition from supple flesh to characterless plastic. It always made Yoruichi feel slightly guilty when she saw it. She laughed and joked with the person that had taken the arm from Kukaku and Kukaku never once complained or even resented her for it. Maybe now Lord Death's actions were having repercussions.

Kukaku stood up and went over to a cabinet. "Come and see this" She got down on her knees and opened the doors. Yoruichi silently came up behind her. Pistol drawn. Kukaku rifled through the cabinet oblivious to Yoruichi's murderous intent. Her hand never shook, she would not falter, today was the last day of Kukaku Shiba's life, the fifteenth head of the Shiba Family Mafia was just about to…

There was a loud bang at the door. In an expert swift movement Yoruichi had the gun tucked away before Kukaku even started to move. "More visitors" She said standing up

"Not expecting anyone?" Yoruichi said in a wondered voice, she was a trained killer; she could cut lifelong bonds like they were nothing… maybe she couldn't, not any more. Yoruichi looked down at her hands, they were shaking. She could feel doubt creeping into her mind. Damn it!

"Oh thank god!" Soul said. Yoruichi looked around to see Soul, Lord Death and Medusa accompanying a slightly uneasy looking Kukaku, she must've figured out they were going to arrest her.

"Soul" Yoruichi said "What are you doing?"

"Making sure you don't go and do something stupid, and there was me thinking you were one of the cooler folk in this town"

"She hired the assassin though" Yoruichi pointed. Kukaku's eyes widened. "She's the robber; she has a vendetta against the DCPD and that's why she sent that diamond to medusa to make us think she was the robber"

"The true robber is here in this room and that person is you!" Soul pointed "Lord Death!"

"Whoa!" Medusa muttered "my wound must've got infected and now I'm hallucinating"

"No you heard right!" He said "you do not know it yet but you were an accomplice"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa" Yoruichi said holding out her hands but her killer instinct zeroed in on lord Death, one sudden move and she was emptying her Beretta in his direction. "Explain please"

"as a matter of fact" Soul said "Kukaku did hire the Konoha Ninja but only as a repercussion"

"Start at the beginning" She said

"Lord Death hates all mob clans and the last strong one remaining is the Kuchiki Clan" He explained "he does not have the skill or the funds to get rid of them but before I got to this house I went to the hospital to talk to Soi Fon and I asked if there were any Ninja groups that did particularly nasty tasks. There is one, they are called the Akatsuki"

"So what?" Yoruichi said "Death robbed the bank to hire the Akatsuki to wipe out the Kuchiki clan?"

"Yes, but he could not launder that amount of money without using someone with serious connections, this is where Kukaku Shiba comes in. She could launder the money for him…" He looked at Kukaku who was sitting on the couch "she was still a little sore about the arm and wouldn't do it without some…leverage so Death arrested Ganju Shiba and blackmailed her into helping him as a retaliation she hired the Konoha Ninja to try to push Yoruichi in the direction of lord Death without revealing that it was her giving the orders" Lord Death crossed his arms, Soul took it as a sign he was on the money with his hypothesis.

"Lord Death, ever the opportunist found out Kukaku sent the assassin when the Post Office workers noticed a strange young boy. So Death forged his P.O Box key and planted it on the Ninja along with a note saying _specifically _to kill Yoruichi Shihouin and thus killing three of the old Mob Clans with one nefarious stone as Yoruichi was supposed to be arrested for the murder of Kukaku Shiba and the robbery of the bank, you also were one of the only people with the means to steal the printer plastic to make a forgery of Yoruichi's print"

"That's all well and good" Lord Death said, his voice now a dark and gravely drawl "but you can't prove it, you can't even explain how I robbed the bank"

"Actually I can!" Soul retorted "Hypnosis, you hypnotised Medusa and the guard into having high maintenance affair with each other and whilst they were busy rolling around the office floor you snuck in, changed the CCTV tapes and robbed the bank. If Medusa suspected anything afterwards you could also use the raw tapes to blackmail her and thus you haven't destroyed them and thus we have evidence you robbed the bank"

"Very well" Death said "you've figured it out…not that it matters now" he tutted "the money I stole disappeared, I had all that raw untraceable cash and someone stole it out from under me"

"Are you gonna give up quietly?" Yoruichi asked as Medusa withdrew a pair of handcuffs.

"Might as well" He said "I doubt I can take you all"

Soul felt incredibly satisfied as he watched Medusa and a police officer drive away with Lord Death in the back seat. Yoruichi came up beside him. "Consider you're trial period over" She said "I think it'll be most beneficial to keep you"

"I like this job" He said "I was almost killed only twice"

"Twice?"

"Yes" He said "Lord Death tried to run me down on my way to find you but the Ninja saved me, it was that that changed everything"

"All in all" Yoruichi took a deep breath and grinned "I think today was a cool day"

"Case closed"

**I hope this story was entertaining for all readers. This one was more of an introduction than a proper story. Please write a review for my first ever Fanfiction! All stories will be in four parts, each uploaded individually. This last chapter… I have to admit is one of my best pieces of writing to date. Don't forget to read the Epilogue below!**

_Epilogue__: _

_ Medusa watched the police officer frantically run around, checking Lord Death's pulse repeatedly. They were not mistaken, he was dead, she hit him with the poisoned needle herself. She turned away to conceal her malevolent smile. She pulled out her mobile and dialled a number. After the fourth ring a cultured male voice answered. "Hello?"_

"_It's me" She said "I have Death's money and now Death is dead"_

"_Very good" he said "I knew I was bribing you for something _

"_So do I get my 30%?" She asked _

"_Of course you do" He replied _

"_Very well" She said "Now that that clown's presence is erased from Death city you can rise to even higher positions. The Kuchiki clan will be the strongest mafia in the world"_

"_That is only natural" He replied and hung up. Medusa smiled and walked away. Urahara emerged from the shadows of a nearby alleyway._

"_Always in the wrong place at the wrong time aren't I?" _


End file.
